Immortality Is A Blessing and a Curse

Battle of the Immortals…Lets see…well to be honest I don’t know of any way I could possibly review this without it sounding like a review of Diablo or Titan Quest. After all that’s almost literally what it is: A BAD version of Diablo or Titan Quest…Oh I know! I can start by discrediting the reviewers who have come before me who were clearly bribed into giving this game the good reviews it currently has that were clearly meant for some other game...say...oh I don't know...DIABLO.

(MMOsite.com)“BoI is a Must Play” – Runescape was a must play at one time, look how that guy turned out, and on that logic any other top view RPG is instantly worth playing too because they all also have “epic loot” “original game play” and mounts that look like they came straight out of World of Warcraft.

(MMORPG.com) “Battle of The Immortals is a perfectly playable and addictive Action-MMO..” - BoI has the entertainment value of a bomb on a school bus. The initial explosion maybe a grand spectacle, but once you look at the incident as a whole it becomes really depressing really fast.

(Massively.com) “Perfect World Entertainment has found a perfect balance in this game.” – A balance between what and what exactly? Is it the perfect balance between Diablo and WoW? Woops there I go again, I told you I can’t go two seconds without comparing it to Diablo because THAT’S WHAT IT IS.

Now onto the actual review: In BoI you play the role of an “immortal” because everyone knows to play the role of a “god” is to break a game in half before it even gets out of beta. Anyway a big problem of some kind is going down in the realm of the mortals so you’re sent down to “earth” with thousands of other immortals like yourself to deal with it. Yes that’s all I managed to get out of the story line; it all evolved a bit too fast for me and eventually it got to the point that I was accepting quests with no reason other than the fact that I got to smite stuff with my powerful “epic loot” that the game GAVE me not even an hour in.

See that is the biggest problem with BoI: it spoils you horribly and holds your hand through almost everything. You have plenty of opportunities for double EXP, for the first hour or so of the game they’re constantly giving you free stuff, and continue to do so with a special chest you can open every 5 levels, and my personal favorite, you have what’s known as a rage skill where you simply run into a massive mob of enemies and then everything on your screen just dies. The rage skill is a good concept but at least make us work for it guys! Don’t instantly fill our rage meter every time we level, and sure as hell don’t make us level after one quest. That’s a literal statement by the way; for the first 15 levels the game goes like this: “quest giver tells you to go kill 15…20 guys – find guys -[rage skill] – turn in quest – level up – repeat steps 1…5.”

That’s not fun, it’s just downright boring, not to mention repetitive. I know I constantly hit MMOs for the constant grind quests but this is a step so far in the wrong direction you fell off a cliff in China trying to move away from a Cliff in Washington D.C.

Battle of The Immortals gets a 3 out of 10; Needless to say I have recently become quite disappointed in Perfect World Entertainment. Now go rot in a trash bin you pathetic excuse for Diablo. (Oh hey look at that I did it again! If you’ve been taking shots to every time I mentioned Diablo [take another] I apologies for making you DRUNK])

Gears of Fate

Like last time I am reviewing yet another Browser-Based MMO that is ahead of its time. Spiral Knights is an action and puzzle strategy hybrid. The experience can only be described as playing LoZ: 4 Swords with 6 people, or better yet, if Castle Crashers was made into an MMO…wait does that exist? Hang on a second.

. . .

Nope sure doesn’t. Anyway you’re a steam-punk robot like “knight” who came to the world on a drop pod from space, after a bit of training you’re sent to Haven on an epic quest to unlock the secrets of the planet’s core, also known as the “Clockwork.” Sounds simple right? Well as it turns out the Clockwork was deliberately built as a massive pit of death; full of monsters, traps, hazards, the whole nine yards. So you and your friends and/or party members must fight your way down level after level of a wondrous underground collecting precious mineral to unlock further parts of the world.

(A prosperous day in the mines: screenshot
made possible by friend and fellow guild
member: HayateButler)

The game is cartoony looking, but in a good way also no matter what level you’re on you have this spectacular view of the clockworks below, gears and leavers constantly in motion keeping the world going. The game may be played level to level, but there is NEVER a since of repetitively, even if you have to go back to the surface and dive back down again. The game is constantly cycling and recycling its levels. This happens in real time, so while one party is sent to a graveyard, another is sent to a highway just as quick. Not only is the level recycled, but each level has at least 3 different entrances and exits so even if you’re playing the same level as you did three minutes ago it’s a completely new map all its own. The feeling of the world in motion gives this game an amazing flow and great and entertaining pace.

Sadly as awesome as this game is, it was made by SEGA a big gaming corporation, so it's bound to have flaws.The biggest problem is what I said in the first paragraph; that this is a “castle crashers MMO.” You and your friends may be on the same team, but that bond is quickly severed by a rush to horde as much loot as you can for yourself, stealing another party members kills, looting the boxes he finds, and the most popular one, hording the biggest minerals for yourself leaving everyone else with tiny insignificant shards. Another thing I’m not too fond of is that every time you enter a level or make a fancy new toy with some alchemic recipe, it consumes “energy” the all important resource that your character apparently needs to so much as breathe. This isn’t that big of a deal, in fact I commend SEGA for finding a way to try and make gamers more active by giving them a time limit (more or less) but you only get 100 energy to your name. It takes 10 energy to go from room to room and there are tons of levels, 20-50 easily.

So now you’re probably thinking “Well there must be some way to get more energy right?” Well yes there are 3 ways. The first is to log off, you have what’s known as “mist energy” your default energy that recharges over time when you’re not doing anything. The second is grind up to about 40k in game cash and buy a ton, but who’s going to do that right? The third option: is to buy “crystal energy” with real money. It’s nice to see SEGA making games for the sake of gamers for a change, but I guess old habits die hard don’t they? (NOTE: this is not meant to be an attack on SEGA, I’m actually a big fan of their products, however I know how most big companies think: with their wallets. If this doesn’t apply to SEGA then I am sorry)

Spiral Knights is a great game by an old school diehard company, it gets a 6 out of 10 and honestly it looks like it’s still in development so I’m going to stick it out and see where it goes.